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So, last night I had sexy dreams which left me in a bit of a fuddle this morning. After nine months of chosen abstinence, I hooked up with Lee a couple of weeks ago as he was driving down to Atlanta. He does this maybe once or twice a year and we usually get together and have a good time. But ever since our last little encounter, I've been feeling a bit off, psychologically. Which has led me to start thinking about sex and love and relationships and how all of that pertains to me, at this point in my life.
I think, because I've been ruminating on the matter for a while, that my subconscious is trying to get into the act by giving me some very erotic dreams. Most have been of the heterosexual variety, which is a bit unusual for me, as guys are just sooooo much easier. (No offense intended to any ladies reading this, but it's kinda true. At least from my perspective.)
And, honestly? I still don't really want to date anyone. But, I'm not sure that I want to bang anyone either. So, I've been considering longterm abstinance. Is it right for me? Would it be healthy for me, from a metal point of view? Am I at the point in my life where I should just lock away my dick and say, "It's been fun, but I think we're kind of done?"
I don't know. It's weird. It's weird having these thoughts and wondering what it means? What the dremas mean, if they mean anything.
It's all very confusing and I'm very tired of thinking about it all. But I like definitives. I like big spoons in the big spoon slot of the drawer, and all the towels nicely rolled and used in proper sequence. I am that sort of person.
And this ambivalence is really fucking pissing me off.
I think, because I've been ruminating on the matter for a while, that my subconscious is trying to get into the act by giving me some very erotic dreams. Most have been of the heterosexual variety, which is a bit unusual for me, as guys are just sooooo much easier. (No offense intended to any ladies reading this, but it's kinda true. At least from my perspective.)
And, honestly? I still don't really want to date anyone. But, I'm not sure that I want to bang anyone either. So, I've been considering longterm abstinance. Is it right for me? Would it be healthy for me, from a metal point of view? Am I at the point in my life where I should just lock away my dick and say, "It's been fun, but I think we're kind of done?"
I don't know. It's weird. It's weird having these thoughts and wondering what it means? What the dremas mean, if they mean anything.
It's all very confusing and I'm very tired of thinking about it all. But I like definitives. I like big spoons in the big spoon slot of the drawer, and all the towels nicely rolled and used in proper sequence. I am that sort of person.
And this ambivalence is really fucking pissing me off.
